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I still can't come. What am I doing wrong?

Short Answer: You may have a vibrator that just isn't right for you, or you may not have found the ideal spot for stimulating yourself. If you have put a lot of time and effort into attempting to climax, and feel that you keep getting "close" but can't seem to actually orgasm, there may be psychological or physical factors that are inhibiting your response.



Long Answer: When first trying out a vibrator, many people simply go straight for the clit, or if it's an insertable vibrator, straight for the vagina. Everybody's different. Experiment with using the vibrator on different parts of your clit, vulva, and vagina, and discover what feels best. You may find you like a few different things. Try adding some water-based lube and see if that improves your sensation.

You might have a vibrator that doesn't provide the right kind of stimulation for you. Maybe you need one that gives less intense or more intense stimulation. If you think the vibrator you have might be too intense, try using it through your clothing, or through a towel or blanket. If you have a vibrator that barely buzzes, try getting a more powerful electrical one, such as an Hitachi Magic Wand or a coil massager.

Consider when and how you're using the vibrator. Are you relaxed and in the right frame of mind for a sensual experience? Make a special time to use your vibrator, when you know you won't be disturbed, and give yourself the luxury of exploring and letting go. Maybe you need a little additional stimulation in the form of erotica, videos, or just fantasies. It's often said that the biggest sex organ is between your ears. You can't just flip the switch and expect the vibrator to do all the work.

If after all this, you still find yourself unable to climax, talk to your doctor. Stress and depression, as well as other physical conditions, may be making it hard to come. If you are taking medications, especially antidepressants, these may also affect your ability to reach orgasm.



Orgasms and General Sexuality
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I still can't come. What am I doing wrong?
Why won't my vibrator get me off anymore?




 
   
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